Its time you all knew that....

I have a therapist.

Yes a therapist, a certified psychologist, a counselor, a "shrink". And I am not embarrassed or shy to admit it. Yet by admitting it I have been startled by people's reactions...

"Wow, thank you for sharing something so private with me"

"That is so brave of you to admit that you are in therapy"

"Really!?! Wow! I had no idea"

Am I missing something? Why is being in therapy such a big deal?

We have all dealt with shit in our lives. Some of us more than others, but whether it was your parents, the bullies on the playground or the super models in the magazines at some point we get fucked up by life. The only difference is that some wear their wounds better than others, some people's pain you can see others you can't.

I became an expert at hiding mine, only when I hid my pain I hid my brilliance as well. There were a lot of trip ups that lead me there, but ended up seeing an image of myself so skewed I would have fallen into a life far less rewarding.

So yes, I am in therapy and I am damn proud of it, because it is not easy! There were whole weeks where I felt I was wearing my emotional turmoil on the surface of my skin and every bump stung like a fresh wound. And after months of dealing, sifting through old ideas, of struggling to go against my conditioning, I am not ashamed; not of crying on the bus, not of freaking out unnecessarily and not of admitting I am in THERAPY.

Top 10 Reasons I <3 NY

My love affair is with New York is no secret. I've wanted to live there since I was 13, and as I grow older my passion grows deeper. After this years two week excursion I have come up with this top ten list.

10. The Museum of Natural History...

I walked through this place with my mouth gaping open, tripping over my own feet with delight. Someone designed this place with me in mind, artifacts, rocks, civilizations and evolution, science and archeology, and dinosaurs. Where was this museum when I was 8?

9. The Scented Candles...

Okay, designer scented candles in Vancouver are an arm and leg ( I know because I have paid it) but in New York not so much. New York boutiques almost always carry at least one, if not three, lines of scented candles. Not only that but they also burn one of these candles so that every boutique has its own signature scent.

8. At the club...

The girls apologize when they step on your shoes. And do so sincerely. No joke!! Not only that, they are aware of your shoes, and make a conscious effort not to step on your shoes, even when drunk!! I was speechless... I ended up thanking a girl for apologizing for stepping on my darling Mui Muis.

7. Diversity...

I found it so fascinating really being surrounded by people of so many different cultures. Not only that, but the diversity leads you to be able to experience so many fascinating culinary adventures. What struck me most about New York's diversity is being able to experience something so wholly outside of your own reality. Stereotypes are shattered and simultaneously confirmed, while understanding is deepened. Experiences can be uncomfortable, awkward, inspiring, surprising but are always interesting.

6. The Neighborhoods...

Chelsea and its museums, Lower East Side and its vintage stores, Midtown with its glitz and glam, and the list goes on. Emerging from the subway one never knows what exactly to expect, what is for sure is the that your experience will be different and intriguing. Whats more is the architecture that is scattered through these neighborhoods is a delightful juxtaposition of old and new. Gothic churches lie next to skyscrapers, while 80's box apartments stand across the street and brownstones are littered throughout.

5. The Subway...

yes there are rats, and congestion, homeless people and often unpleasant odors. But the system is so comprehensive traveling around Manhattan is incredibly easy.

4. "Junk" Food...

New Yorkers know how to do the bagel and cream cheese thing so well. A bagel comes with its own weight in delicious artery clogging cream cheese, and is dense yet fluffy, not a brick as is the Canadian custom. And of course...there is no such thing as a bad slice in NY. I have no clue what they do to make their pizza taste so good, whatever it is they are doing it right!!

3. Art...
The Met, MOMA, Broadway and Lincon Center are just the beginning. Art rivals litter in this city, found in the most unlikely of places: the walls of the subway stations, decorating barbed wire fences, unlikely theaters up precarious staircases and the t shirt of someone passing by. Public art is provocative and whether it is appealing or not always leads to good discussion. Whether your tastes are classical, modern or something altogether different, the New York art scene will have something for you.

2. The men...

I knew I had landed in New York when the border guard spent more time hitting on me than asking me the regulatory questions. When a man checks you out in this city, he wants to get caught. When you look good, you KNOW you look good. In the clubs, when you dance the men don't scurry into corners like nocturnal creatures running from lamplight, they step up and buy you a drink....LOVE IT!!!

1. The NY attitude...

there is no time for bullshit in New York. People are upfront, honest and kind. They will give you honest directions, they will check you out and tell you what they think. Go to coffee by yourself, and you can still have endless conversations with the surrounding clientele. With people being so upfront and honest, you are forced to throw your facades by the wind and act from an authentic place. Forget passive aggressive bullshit, forget manipulation, and welcome in honesty and truth. Thats what makes New York my favorite place on earth.

Resurection...

Of the blog.

So its been a while. Slowly and cumulatively I have been realizing constructive having a blog can be. I have so many ideas for things that I would like to write about yet so few of them come to be materialized. Yet I never lifted a pen or finger. I figure that publishing my own blog is a good step along the road to getting someone else to publish me.

So, here goes nothing. I hope you all chose to tune in and enjoy.

Much love

B