Stepping out of the Closet...

Here is my confession.

I am a closeted hip hop lover.

If you were to peer at my iTunes you would find a ton of Fiest, Death Cab for Cutie, Flaming Lips and other indie wonders. Bands which I do love, bands which have nursed heartaches, been soundtracks for beautiful moments and tracks that are frequently my choice on quiet candle lit evenings.

But were you to look at my most frequently played list it would go something like this:

Because of You - Ne-Yo
Lost in Love - I-15
Don't Stop the Music - Riahnna
Give it to Me - Timbaland

You get the idea. So, not only do I love hip hop, I love mainstream, top-40 shake-your-booty-on-the-dance floor hip hop. And when I say love, I mean I listen to these songs like its going out of style: 10 repeats on the subway ride to school another 5 on the way to class, and indulgence mid day and a repeat on the evening commute home....and that is just one tune.

So, here is the thing. While I love these songs they make up less than 10% of music collection. Why, you ask? Because I am ashamed.

Take today for example, I was rocking the pavements walking to school as I listened to Riannah, and I bumped into a new friend. We got to talking about my iPhone (the device fueling my Riahnna dance party) when my screen shot in his direction, immediately I compulsively hid it, in shame that I may be recognized for the top 40 hip-hop addict that I am.

Now really, this is preposterous.

I've grown up with an older brother that called my music 'crap', saying that instead I should listen to the likes of Queen and Led Zepplin instead. And being that I thought my big bro was pretty cool I listened... to Incubus, Wintersleep, I tried punk rock when I dated a guy who was into it, I did the works. But nothing fit like hip hop fits. Don't get me wrong, there no one can get a road trip off to a great start like Freddy Mercury, nor is there anything like listening to Bon Jovi while washing windows.

But when I want to enjoy an otherwise mundane moment, like taking the subway, like getting ready to go out for a Saturday night, there is NOTHING like a little bit of Justin or JayZ or Timbaland. Truth be told, I am the girl who grew up in love with Micheal and Janet, I am the girl who dreamed about hip hop while confined to tondues in ballet class....through and through.... the truth is I LOVE THIS SHIT!!!